Third Wheel

I was asked by a family member on my husband's side to go out.  We never go out together so I was very shocked by this request.  I felt special, like I had be selected for something great.  It made me feel like the person valued me and wanted to get to know me better.  However, I found out that I was not that person's first choice that in fact she and another person had planned to meet up for quite sometime and I was like the third wheel.  I cried.  It sounds stupid now as I write this but, I just have so much baggage of not being people's first choice. I am the girl who has had many rejections by suppose to be friends where they have chosen people over me.   So that insecurity poked its ugly head up and I cried.  I felt like why couldnt she have asked me first.  Even though I had fun, I struggled with the feeling of being the third wheel..It was obviously that the two of them have more closeness and I just felt like I was trying so hard to fit in, to be heard , to be liked.  But in the end I still enjoyed hanging with them and we are suppose to do it again. Maybe one day someone will see that I am not a third wheel but a good first choice.